Uncle Brian’s Miracle Weight Loss Pill

In this day and age where everyone wants a miracle pill to shed fat and get into shape, I’ve got great news. I found one! And, when combined with diet, exercise, and discipline, it really works! I call it Uncle Brian’s Miracle Weight Loss Pill.

Here’s what you need to do when you’re on Uncle Brian’s Miracle Weight Loss Pill:

  1. Take the pill every morning, every night, and with each meal.
  2. Eat a sensible diet that includes the right number of calories and watch the ratios of carbs, fats, and protein.
  3. Get up and move around. Exercise a little.
  4. Watch the weight fall off.

Active Ingredients:  Nothing. Not a thing.

Okay. So, there’s a chance that Uncle Brian’s Miracle Weight Loss Pill is actually a placebo. The pill itself doesn’t do anything or have anything in it.

The point is that we’re all looking for something to make this journey easier. We all want some way to make our problems go away without putting in the work. I’ll bet a lot of people even read the instructions above and stopped after #1, hoping–assuming–that maybe they’d still get a third of the results if they skipped steps 2 and 3.  I’m constantly amazed when I consider that the weight-loss supplement market is a 6 billion dollar industry, and none of the products are anything other than a placebo.

Why are we so afraid of hard work? Why are we so afraid of discipline? Are we so afraid to make ourselves BETTER PEOPLE? Why are we so afraid to actually earn something we want so badly? What lessons are we teaching our children if we teach them that hard work can be replaced by drugs?

So, I’ll save you some money. If you’re the kind of person who sincerely believes that weight loss is only possible if you’re taking a special miracle pill, here’s a link on Amazon to a genuine placebo. Take it as often as you like, and don’t skip steps 2 and 3, and I’m sure the pill will work wonders for you!

(Side note: the reviews on this product are hilarious).